Category: poetry

the girl that got away

It’s funny how you would even consider

Being better does not have to make me bitter

Just irritated that you would think

You’d ever have it better than me

Thought that if you had one

Then you could have two

But I’m a whole lotta woman

And you bit off more than you could chew

Looking over there thinking you could find

A love so pure and true I’d call you mine

Knowing I know you like you know yourself

Without the ancillaries

And the cards you were dealt

Now you see that I see you

It’s funny how you’d considered

Me choosing you

unforgettable

what a wild trip around the sun

when i began this adventure

the goal was singular

to satisfy my appetite

many lessons learned

i cringe when thinking about the burn

never had this stage of life

throwing caution to the wind and taking flight

who knew this cliff could be so high

now addicted to the thrill knowing i survived

how again will i cheat death

gale force winds to take my breath

to kiss you once again

feel the softness of your skin

roll over with laughter

as we dance in the livingroom

hips rolling, vibes flowing

light the green

set the scene

another round of you and me

i wonder this time

where we’ll be

joshua 1:9

You’ll find grace here because I’ve been in your place

You’ll find that I’m fit to tie shoes unlaced

Can empathize with every predicament

Can sympathize in whatever state your in

I know I don’t look like I’ve been to hell and back

Cried oceans of tears, almost drowned in my sorrow

My brood the only reason for waking up on the morrow

Wishing each gasp of air was my last breath

Beat my chest at God wanting Him to end it.

And he did

But I didn’t go out like no bitch

So there are no excuses

So here is the short and quick of it.

Know yourself, to thine own self be true

Become the person you’ve always wanted to

Be, have, and needed as a child and teen

Kill your inner victim, you’re your greatest enemy

Make peace with God and self, it’s time to fly free

Ask our fathers on the ancestral plane

To lead and guide you to victory and out of pain.

You’re not a child, stop taking unnecessary risks.

You’re a man now, stop putting up with your own shit.

Be the parent your child would be proud to have

Be the partner and lover who secures the bag

It’s all so very simple but you’d rather make it hard

Only night reveals who you really are.

Shine bright king, you’re the captain of your ship,

on to other harbors, you’re well equipped.

Tap in and don’t take another sip or inhale

Until you’ve set the intention to prevail.

*Joshua 1:9 – Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”

existential ramblings

I am so tired and angry

Why won’t life just let me be

Leave me alone to sink

Instead of offering solace

In making my self better

All the things to be done

Just to function

Releasing oneself from this matrix

Should be treated as an act of bravery

To find the end of self to only see nothingness

It takes bravery to risk the pain of those who love you to escape this fate

What if I was weak and easy to break

Would anyone of you given me a break?

Or would you surrounded me like prey

It takes courage to face the fact

that in each of our realities we are the victim

So we all are antagonist in each others stories

We compile many virtues to tell a tale of glory

Or one of pity and betrayal

Is this existence solely to do one harm?

I know im not innocent.

Because I am just, right and pure

The more you fuck around and find out

that I’m not so sure.

Who sent me flowers or brought me a meal?

Who showed up at my door with a care package?

Who has done any of the things I would do for them?

Then I realize that I’m so imperfect.

I can’t always be there for everybody,

No matter how hard I try someone is gonna say you could have done better?

Maybe so, but maybe no.

Because I can’t and I’ve tried.

easier to run away or die.

Maybe just disappear without a trace.

Isn’t that what death is? Either way you flip it.

How could they leave me and not give me what I need?

Who is so much better than me?

Am I not enough for them to do better?

What about us? Isn’t that enough and even more?

The greatest miracle would be a divine counterpart.

Or a human who loves themselves so much that everything is always enough.

I’ll just go back to sleep and plug back in

Wake up and do it all over again.